27/12/2012, Thursday,
Santa Barbara, CA
Last night
L. woke up at 3 am with 38.5 degree fever. I was very worried that it was going
to worsen. Thank God, her fever dropped and during the day her coughing
reduced. But she still has a very runny nose and is sneezy. At least, her
respiratory canals are open and she doesn’t have a headache.
After
leaving Beverly Hills, we continued our journey towards Santa Barbara on the
Pacific Coast Highway (PCH). The view was spectacular.
We passed by the blue
and calm ocean and wide, clean, sandy beaches on our left and green hills and
mountains with palm trees and cacti on our right.
We passed through Malibu. The
houses here block the ocean view but this doesn’t last long. The nature and
roads of this region made me forget completely that I am in America. In places,
I felt like I was in Southern Turkey and in some in Southern France. I would
have never guessed that there is such natural beauty in America.
We settled
in room 6 at Blue Sands Motel for tonight. Thank God that F. seems to be
getting better too. As our journey tomorrow will be long, we have decided to go
to Neverland today. Since the age of 11-12, I used to study these regions,
mountains and roads in the atlas and try to figure out where Neverland is. I
have dreamt of and tried coming here for years. It was meant for today.
As we drove
up the Santa Ynez Mountains, I was overcome by a variety of emotions in the
face of incomparable beauty and peacefulness of the nature.
As I was gob
smacked by the natural beauty, I understood fully well why Michael chose to
live here.
These heavenly mountains and valley are far away from all the
bustling, ugliness and dirt. Besides peace, my heart was palpating and my mouth
was dry as if I was going to Michael’s concert.
I knew that
the private equity firm, which now controls Neverland didn’t leave anything
here. Nevertheless, I would have regretted not coming and stepping my foot
here. Of course, it is impossible to enter the ranch. Even though the land is
very large, it is surrounded with wires. Actually, my plan was to jump over and
go in but F. warned me that the security would arrest me.
Nothing is
left from Michael’s days at Neverland’s main gate.
There are curious cars and
people coming to the gate. It is impossible to see the house from the entrance.
Fans have written their names and thoughts on the rocks at the entrance and the
gate.
One sent a Christmas tree along with a Christmas card underneath. F. gave
me a pen and so I wrote our three names, the date and that we always love him.
There were
a couple of cars on the other side of the gate. Suddenly a blond, ice blue eyed
man appeared and told me off to not park our car on the grass.
He definitely
did not look like security. I guess that he was an employee of the private
equity firm. He had no resemblance to Tarek with whom I met at Encino.
Nevertheless, in order to avoid regret, I asked if it is possible to go in. He
bluntly answered: “This is a private property.” Without a choice, we headed
back. In the meantime, we saw a wild cat sitting peacefully in the ranch. Once
he saw us, he ran away jumping. Then he stopped and started watching us.
This
is really a peace of heaven. I am not surprised at all that Michael chose this
place for peace and happiness. But neither Michael deserves to be lying inside
that cold marble in Forest Lawn nor Neverland deserves to be ripped off of its
old days and separated from Michael’s fans.
On our way
to our next stop Solvang, we passed through the town of Los Olivos of which
Neverland is a part.
I haven’t seen a single African American here or in all of
Santa Barbara. There are Hispanics but especially in the Santa Ynez Valley and
Los Olivos, there are only whites and even Red Necks in some places. No wonder
Michael faced difficulties here in the last years.
In this
beautiful valley, there are vineyards and wineries. As I saw the settlements in
this area, I became very jealous of the inhabitants-Michael’s neighbors.
Whoever wanted could have easily seen and met with Michael.
Solvang is
a very cute and pretty Danish town.
The settlers have really created a very
nice and cute Denmark here.
I kept on thinking that Michael also came here,
passed through these roads (close to his home) so many times. Then I started
crying again. First, they were tears of happiness. God granted me the
opportunity to come and see here. I am incredibly happy, very lucky. Then a
little bit of tears of sadness. If I weren’t so late in coming here…
We had our
dinner at a Mexican restaurant called Los Agavos in Santa Barbara. Finally, we
have found a Mexican restaurant just as we wanted with a very delicious menu!
28/12/2012, Friday
My dear
L. cried almost the entire night. Of course, we don’t know what was bothering
her but I think she had gas. My poor baby couldn’t get enough rest. I wish she
would get well fully…
It is
possible to see hawks in Santa Ynez and over the Pacific Coast Highway (PCH).
After a
short walk in the morning on the beach and by the ocean, we had a splendid
breakfast at Joe’s Café on State Street (Santa Barbara).
I can easily say that
I had never had such quality “American” breakfast before in the US. After
going around a little in this beautiful town, we started our journey towards
Northern California on the PCH surrounded by views of the ocean and green
mountains and fields. I really liked Santa Barbara, especially the Santa Ynez
Mountains and Valley. I easily understand why people choose to retire here and
why Michael chose here to find peace and happiness.
But this
place gave Michael both happiness and loneliness as well as big pain towards
the end. The redneck prosecutor of the time was obsessed with him. He didn’t
have a place here as an African American. On the other hand, a jury consisting
of Caucasians exonerated him. But it was too late. Big wounds were carved in
his soul. This fairy town and nature staged a big tragedy.
It was as
if I had already seen and known these roads, mountains and nature in Santa
Ynez. I never felt like a newcomer. Very strange. I keep on thinking that I
wish I could have come when he was alive. I feel regret. But when I was broke,
internet and transport were not as developed, it was more difficult. I am
constantly trying to bring him back. I need to stop this. The past is in the
past. I need to accept that. Now, he is with the Creator, safe and resting. God
willing, he is in peace. But I am infinitely grateful to the Creator. Now, I
have accomplished all I wanted in life. Now my life is completely and solely
dedicated to L. and F. I pray for the same for everyone else.
There is
only one more thing I am going to add about this topic. There is absolutely not
an iota of thing in the memory of Michael Jackson in Santa Barbara even though
it was the place where this important and famous person lived. His name is not
written anywhere. I haven’t seen his picture anywhere. His trace is erased even
from Neverland. The superficial success of racism and jealousy. It is
impossible to erase love and the truth from hearts and mind.
The Pismo
Beach was our next stop.
It is mainly a camper’s beach. Nevertheless, the
beach’s width, sand and water are amazing. The waves are ideal for surfers.
In fact,
PCH is not that different than Aegean roads. But nature here is unspoilt.
As the dark
settled, we just arrived at Butterfly Grove Inn in Pacific Grove. We settled in
room 12. As Pacific Grove is a very small town, the restaurant options are very
limited. Wherever we tried was packed full. We chose the restaurant with the
shortest waiting time of 20 minutes…
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